Andrew Heller

Best. Columnist. Ever.

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Auchtoons: Hey, Donny, doing it right isn’t that hard

February 25, 2019 by John Auchter 4 Comments

Toon & text by John Auchter It's true. Michigan is building a new bridge with Canada — the Gordie Howe Bridge between Detroit and Windsor. And Canada is indeed paying for it. In fact, credit where credit is due, that's how Governor Snyder made the deal happen — with his … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Auchtoons Tagged With: andrewheller.com, Auchtoons, John Auchter

Come Heller high water … the whiny, is winter ever going to end edition

February 23, 2019 by Andrew Heller 18 Comments

Come Heller high water … Every winter, there is a moment where I reach the "over it" stage of winter, and there's no going back. I reached it this week. I had just come in from doing the driveway for the 872nd time, took my boots off, sat down to watch TV with the lovely … [Read more...]

Filed Under: All Columns, Come Heller high water Tagged With: andrewheller.com, Come Heller high water

Auchtoons: Amazingly, accountability isn’t a partisan issue

February 18, 2019 by John Auchter 1 Comment

Toon & text by John Auchter I can tell you that the cartoon this week is not partisan, but that's really for you to decide. On the surface, it's me quoting the current Democrat leader directly and without comment, then dinging the two previous Republican leaders. But I had … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Auchtoons Tagged With: Andrew Heller, Auchtoons, John Auchter

Come Heller high water … the shame on us edition

February 17, 2019 by Andrew Heller 67 Comments

Come Heller high water … Vox.com published a fantastic and eye-opening interactive map this week detailing all of the mass shootings in the United States since Sandy Hook. Remember Sandy Hook? That’s the one in 2012 where grade schoolers – little kids - were slaughtered. … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Come Heller high water, Guns Tagged With: andrewheller.com, Come Heller high water

Surveyin’ da Situation: So this happened when Yooper John’s wife met McDreamy

February 16, 2019 by Andrew Heller 2 Comments

By John Matonich My part of the world in the west end of the U.P. sure isn’t L.A., but every now and again we are visited by folks who could be considered celebrities. The curious reality about them coming here is many times they go unrecognized and pretty much travel around … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Guest columnists, John Matonich Tagged With: andrewheller.com, john matonich

Murch: Winter has reduced him to brain droppings

February 14, 2019 by Steve Murch 6 Comments

By Steve Murch I've officially crossed over to the side of humanity that complains about winter. I’m so over it, I can’t form a thought longer than three sentences. And so … When I was heading into the 7th grade my family moved from the Thumb area of Michigan north to the … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Guest columnists, Steve Murch Tagged With: andrewheller.com, steve murch

Come Heller high water … the ‘Jeff Bezos did what?’ edition

February 10, 2019 by Andrew Heller 16 Comments

Come Heller high water … One of the strangest, dumbest and most off target cold openings ever on SNL last night. What the heck was that? Subject: A "Meet the Press" roundtable on Jeff Bezos’ wing-wang. Really guys? Out of the goldmine that is today’s politics, that’s what … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Guest columnists, Humor Tagged With: Andrew Heller, Come Heller high water

Auchtoon: Next week’s weather forecast? Cloudy with a 70 percent chance of Trump

February 4, 2019 by Andrew Heller 3 Comments

Toon & text by John Auchter It appears the snow has finally stopped falling here in West Michigan. In a day or two it is supposed to turn reasonably warm enough for me to attend to the non-priority snow removal issues — the roof, patios, walkways. Before the rains come. … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Auchtoons, Guest columnists

Come Heller high water … the ‘I can’t believe the refs called that’ Super Bowl edition

February 3, 2019 by Andrew Heller 17 Comments

Come Heller high water … My Top 10 Super Bowl predictions: 1) The pregame shows will be irritating and full of weepy stories about players overcoming long odds or difficult backgrounds to become, gosh darn it, wonderful people who spend most of their free time “giving back.” … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Come Heller high water Tagged With: Andrew Heller, Come Heller high water

Surveyin’ da Siutation: The metric system finally measures up

February 2, 2019 by John Matonich 6 Comments

By John Matonich I have been enjoying a series on Amazon TV recently. It’s called “Corner Gas” and features a gas station and restaurant in Dog River, Saskatchewan, Canada. The characters are solid and the show was called one of Canada’s funniest when it was on Canadian TV. My … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Guest columnists, John Matonich Tagged With: john matonich

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About The Author

Andrew Heller has been an enduringly popular newspaper columnist in Michigan for a long, long, long time. He wrote his first column for the Escanaba Daily Press way back in 1979. It was about his … Continue Reading

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BOOK: Come-Heller-High-Water-by-Andrew-Heller ISBN-13:9780964983212

Come Heller High Water I is the collection readers asked for, and includes columns that they wanted reprints of.

In true Heller style, topics cover everything from the craziness of having kids to tales from his U.P. days.

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BOOK: Come-Heller-High-Water 2-by-Andrew-Heller ISBN-13:9780964983212

Come Heller High Water II is the smash hit follow-up to Come Heller High Water I. It includes everything from Andy's takes on modern life to conversations with his back home pal Moon Dimple, and much, much more.
 

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BOOK: Saving the World One Column at a Time Paperback  ISBN-10: 0971495114 ISBN-13: 978-0971495111

Saving the World One Column at a Time is a bitingly funny look at the world through the eyes of this award-winning columnist. In it he takes on corporate crooks, Little League parents, tongue piercers, ketchup sinners and much, much more. A must-have for Heller fans.

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