In the musical “Little Shop of Horrors,” Audrey II, the man-eating plant, sings “You can do it! Feed me, Seymour, feed me all night long, ha ha ha ha ha! Cause if you feed me, Seymour, I can grow up big and strong.” Seymour obeys, and sure enough, the plant grows so big and … [Read more...]
Auchtoons: Suddenly, bailouts and ‘socialism’ are OK with the GOP
By John Auchter Admittedly, comparing the financial crisis that precipitated the Great Recession to the one we're currently experiencing is kinda apples-to-oranges. Different economics, different timelines, different triggers. Still, am I the only one feeling disorientated by … [Read more...]
Perspective, it’s a beautiful thing
When people think the sky is falling, there’s an obvious risk in saying “Yes, it is … but it’s also not.” I’m going to take that risk. Yes, the coronavirus is awful. It’s killed roughly 12,000 worldwide so far. But it could have killed more. Believe it or not, the world … [Read more...]
Come Heller high water … the zombie toilet paper apocalypse edition
Come Heller high water … Remember in 2016 when you said “Don’t worry, he’ll grow into the job” and “Hey, he led a business, he can lead the United States”? And then, later, when you said, “The economy is doing great and the stock market is all him!” and “Yeehaw, look at my … [Read more...]
We need a vaccine for another kind of virus, too
We can learn a lot from coronavirus. Lesson 1: Life is precious and we are all fragile, so take care of yourself and others, especially the very old and very young, for they are the most vulnerable. Lesson 2: Wash your damned hands, people, and not just after using the … [Read more...]
Auchtoons: You’re not marrying them, you’re just picking a leader
By John Auchter I'm sure many of you have seen the meme going around social media meant to assuage voters whose preferred presidential candidate has dropped. It's just a block of words that says this: "Time to remember the best voting advice I have heard: Voting isn't … [Read more...]
Come Heller high water … the March sucks edition
Come Heller high water … We have entered March, the worst, most dispiriting month of the year. It’s a fake, a trickster, a sham, a liar, a temptress and a tease. It’s supposed to come in like a lion and go out like a lamb but it never does. Not in Michigan. Whoever wrote … [Read more...]
Come Heller high water … the anybody but Trump edition
Come Heller high water … None of the Democrats did well at Wednesday’s debate. If they were Snow White & the Six Dwarfs, Warren have been Snappy, Buttigieg would have been Snippy, Klobuchar would have been Defensive, Biden would have been Sleepy, Bloomberg would have … [Read more...]
Auchtoons: We’ll do anything but fix health care
There was an article in the Detroit Free Press this week, "Some Michigan libraries join nationwide trend: Eliminating late fees on overdue books." Here's an excerpt: Libraries in metro Detroit, Michigan and across the U.S. have or are considering joining the nationwide trend of … [Read more...]
Tough is as tough does
I heard a sportscaster the other day describe a pro athlete as “tough.” He didn’t define what he meant but I assume he meant the guy plays through pain, rises above adversity etc. – the usual jock stuff. Cynical Andy thought, “Well, of course he does, he’s paid $20 million … [Read more...]
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