Murch: Winter has reduced him to brain droppings

By Steve Murch

I’ve officially crossed over to the side of humanity that complains about winter. I’m so over it, I can’t form a thought longer than three sentences. And so …

• When I was heading into the 7^th grade my family moved from the Thumb area of Michigan north to the Snow Belt. After the move north I embraced all things winter. I learned to ski, we had a huge sledding hill nearby, and my friends and I played hockey and winter football. Today, my outside activity is limited to shoveling and going from building to vehicle and back again. I have become, in short, a winter wimp.
• Thankfully, the best phrase every winter just happened: Pitchers and catchers have reported to spring training.
• So, we all know the president loves to exaggerate when it comes to numbers. And when they’re proven wrong, why do so many people use the excuse “So and so does it, too.” Folks, two wrongs don’t make a right no matter how hard you try. And a 6,500 capacity arena is nowhere near 35,000.
• Did you see the story about the New Jersey man and his daughter who saved people from a burning building this week? Whenever I see a story like that I wonder if I would have the ability to do that, jump to action and be selfless enough to risk my life to help others. I would like to believe I would, but I really don’t want to have to find out. Could you do it?
• I’m always amazed at how many “celebrities” I’ve never heard of. These are the “stars” of reality TV shows you hear of mostly when news is reported about such and such star getting into some altercation or trouble with the law. You know, he/she starred in “The Real Housewives Big Brother World Survivor on the Jersey Shore, Boston Season.” Either this is their attempt to grab another 15 minutes of fame and they got caught, or they were destined for a life of crime but celebrity got there first.
• How many of you remember the 1970 song “In the Summertime” by Mungo Jerry? Funny side note: None of the band members past or present was named Jerry. Anyway, the song is really catchy and can become a real earworm and can drive you crazy. Every time I hear it, I have to chuckle at the first couple of lines from the second verse: “If her daddy’s rich, take her out for a meal. If her daddy’s poor, just do what you feel.” How well do you think a line like that would go over in today’s PC world?
• I find it funny that Donald Trump Jr. is referred to as DJTJ. It kinda rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?
• Did you see the photo of the Baton Rouge policeman who used blackface to go undercover in the early 1990s? While blackface is offensive, I was left with questions. Did someone really think it would work, and if it worked how? Those guys could get mistaken as African-American as easily as I could get mistaken for George Clooney.
• It’s time for me to watch some highlights of people playing catch in Florida and feel the coming warmth, even if it’s months away. After two hours of shoveling I need it.

Steve Murch is a former managing editor and award-winning columnist for The Alpena News. He’s a lifelong Michigan resident, a broken and defeated fan of the Detroit Lions and a forever optimistic fan of the Detroit Tigers. His column will appear most Thursdays.