Come Heller high water …
- Yeah, I believe Hillary Clinton when she says she didn’t tell anyone about the pneumonia at first because she thought it was no big deal. My mom has had an operation and didn’t tell anyone. It’s how that generation rolls. When we found out, we asked mom why she didn’t tell us, she said, without a trace of humor, “You didn’t ask.” So now we ask, even if she seems fine. “Any operations today, mom? Having your gall bladder removed? A leg chopped off? Anything like that?” My guess is reporters will do the same with Clinton from here on out. I pity her.
- Seriously, though, I’m not worried about Clinton’s or Trump’s health. Sure, they could die or be incapacitated in office. Stuff happens. But presidential candidates in their late 60s and early 70s these days are a lot likelier to be healthy than ever before. Do you know how many of our presidents had real and undisclosed health issues? Do you know how many smoked, drank, never exercised, had quacks for doctors, had cancer, dementia, heart disease and so on? If we’re so worried about the health of our president, maybe we need an age limit.
- What I don’t like about modern presidential elections is they’re all about the parties trying to get our shorts in a bunch over stuff that doesn’t matter. They’re spook shows, bogeyman fests. Maybe it’s always been that way, but it’s discouraging. Can we please hear something substantive?
- Here’s how I think presidential campaigns should go: The parties pick their own candidates without a primary. I don’t care how they do it – flip a coin, poll your party, whatever. Then on Nov. 1 everyone gets the day off work – by law – and – by law – they are required to read a uniform one-page Q&A about each candidate and their views. The next day we all vote online or at precincts. Boom. Done. Popular vote, no electoral college, so it’s not just the big states that matter. If someone doesn’t vote, they pay a hefty fine and their photo is posted in the town square on a big board.
- Favorite insult meme of the week: “You are the reason they have instructions on shampoo bottles.”
- Airfare seems really cheap right now. They must be up to something.
- I’ll repeat: NFL football games do not require pregame, halftime or postgame mini-concerts, for gosh sakes. Who the heck decided I had to endure Birks Dentley, or whatever the heck his name is, before the game? Aren’t the former NFL players and coaches who think they’re hysterical bad enough? Reminder to self: Do not turn on game until after the game has started.
- People seem ridiculously excited that Chik-fil-A is opening branches in Lansing and Troy. May I ask why? I’ve been to one. It seemed like a fast food joint. Am I missing something? Mostly it seems like they can’t spell.
- OK, perhaps Hillary was too cutting with her “basket of deplorables” quip about the racists, homophobes and Islamophobes who support him. Maybe she could have been a touch softer by going with something like “hamper of haters” or “Hefty sack of intolerants.” Still doesn’t change the fact that a lot of Trump supporters are indisputably and proudly what she called them. Truth hurts, I guess.
- “Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.” – P. J. O’Rourke.
Image credit: DonkeyHotey