Come Heller high water … the GOP convention edition
- Well, the GOP convention has lived up to billing so far. Floor fights. Plagiarism. Scott Baio. And that entrance! Did you see Trump’s entrance with the fog and the backlighting and the podium that rose out of the floor? That was awesome, I don’t care who you are. It reminded me of LeBron James’s “I’m taking my talents to South Beach” announcement. Only slighter more egotistical. And with much worse hair.
Wait, Scott Baio? Scott Baio – from “Happy Days” (1974) and “Charles in Charge” (1984) – and the guy from “Duck Dynasty” are the best celebs they could find? Who’s next, the major from ‘I Dream of Jeannie” and one of the fish from “Wicked Tuna”?- OK, plagiarizing your speech is bad. But the writer who plagiarized it plagiarized if from Michelle Obama – the wife of the anti-Christ. That’s like God cribbing lines from Beelzebub.
- I feel bad for Melania, actually. She just read what they gave her. But the memes have been hilarious nonetheless. My fave: “I would like to give a shout-out to my daughters Sasha and Malia.” Ouch.
- Forget all of Trump’s racist, bully, hey world I’m gonna straighten you out stuff. You wanna know the very best, most compelling reason not to vote for him in November? If he wins, we’ll never hear the end of the term “double down,” as in “Controversy erupted when Donald Trump doubled down on this contention that left handers should have their left arms tied behind their backs until such time as they ‘learn to do things right.’” Argh! Isn’t that enough of a reason?
- Looking at the crowd at the GOP convention is like looking at a painting of a blizzard on a white background framed in a white frame hanging on a white wall.
- Which oddly enough makes me wonder if Trump’s “black guy” is there?
- I also wonder if any convention-goers can get served in Middle Eastern or Mexican restaurants in Cleveland this week? Yeah, probably not.
- If I were Kasich, Jeb, Christie or Rubio, I’d walk around the convention floor with a sign saying, “I look pretty good right about now, don’t I?”
- I’m sure you’ve seen the photo of the teeny-weeny border wall ringed with barbed wire that someone built around Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. They actually did a pretty nice job but I’d have been more impressed if they’d included a whole bunch of tunnels dug beneath it and maybe some watch towers with machine gun nests.
- It was truly heartwarming – in this era of shallow, mean-spirited politics – to hear the entire crowd chanting as one “Lock her up!” about Hillary Clinton, wasn’t it? I got a tear in my eye. Really. I expected much, much worse. Like “Give her the chair!”
- The theme of the convention is “Make America Safe Again.” Oddly enough that’s very similar to next week’s Democratic convention theme, “Make America Safe – Don’t Let Trump Near the White House.”
- Worst thing about the convention: I have now watched MSNBC. I feel unclean. And yet oddly entertained in a libby liberal sort of way.
- Note to Brian Williams: STOP USING THE TERM STEM-WINDER, Dammit! It’s annoying. This isn’t the 1840s.
- Yes, I’ll be making fun of the Dems, too, next week. Without politicians, who would we laugh at? But let’s face it – Dems are far less funny. But I’ll try.
- “Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind.” – George Orwell.
Image: YouTube
“That’s like God cribbing lines from Beelzebub.” I am dying. This is quite possibly the best line ever written.
Whew. Gotta go get s drink of water or something.
you are far more generous than I. My favorite meme was the one announcing the norovirus spreading though the RNC. “Now we have a literal sh*tstorm”
Ha, I didn’t see that one. I stand corrected. I love a good shitstorm.
CBS news counted- there were 18 black people there. Gail King (who is black) said she met 10 and she’d try to find the other 8!! My laugh for the day. LOL
I’m easily amused I know.
Did they really? That’s awesome.
As a (former) life-long Republican, I tried to watch. Even prescription anti-nausea medications wouldn’t help. Now it appears we are stuck with no good choices. On one hand a pair of grandstanding bullshit artists. On the other someone I wouldn’t want living in my neighborhood. Excuse me while I go out into the back yard and scream in frustration at the moon.
All you good people are just waiting for the mind-numbed pacifying talk from Hillary next week which are the same promises Dems have made for 60 years. And where has it gotten the blacks and the poor?
The Dems only create another welfare program which only exacerbates the problem. And they ignore any talk of foreign problems because it’s too messy to talk about. It’s easier to promise more government and make everybody feel good!
A really good Welfare program maybe is exactly what we need. How about Welfare and Medicare for everybody? I am working on the details. Will report.
I have listened to some of the hogwash but have yet to hear anything that could pass for policy – just a bunch of gasbags bloviating about a vainglorious douche bag, aka, the lacquer headed Orange Lord.
I have no answers for anything political right now (but is sure is fun to watch). One thing I do know for sure, however, is who we would laugh at if not for politicians – the Lions, of course. Keep up the good work, Chief. Love the site.
Good day, Mr. Reed. How is ya? ANd more important, where is ya?
Far Western Outpost in Colorado. High Plains Drifter. OK, high plains, but set down roots. I get to watch good football and bad hockey here, the opposite of Detroit. Didn’t follow MLive much, but you and the Freep Sports are my Mitten State fix on the bookmarks bar.
I watched and listened to most of the republican show.
The worst parts happened when the liberal media talking heads (with a lot of space between the ears) started commenting on who ever spoke. As for there being no blacks present, I do believe a retired Lt. Colonel Alan West spoke during one session.
But, then again, the truth does not matter to democrats. They are more equipped to lie to the voters (sheeple) of the United States.
If Martin Luther King Jr. was alive today he would vote republican, Oh, I forgot he was a life long republican. That is one of the reasons the southern democrats did not like him.
As to this plagiarism issue it is not really an issue to me. The liberal democrats will find some sort of anthill and try to make into Mt. Everest.
Meanwhile all the very shady and quite unlawful things that Hilliary does that is equal to Mt. Everest the liberal, like Andy, will try to make them into something smaller than an anthill.
I am not very happy with Donald Trump, but, I will vote for him over Hilliary
Clinton.