Come Heller high water…
- Hey, Rachel Maddow, it’s not earth-shattering news that the non-interesting pages of Trump’s 2005 tax return surfaced. If he didn’t leak it himself, I’ll eat my socks. (Notice how weak his objection has been. He wanted this out to show he pays taxes – or at least he did then – and to take attention off his phony claim that Obama spied on him.) But it would have been huge news if it had come with all the juicy stuff about who paid him money and who he owes money to. The laugh’s likely to be on him, ultimately, because somehow, some way those pages – and other releases – will surface. It’s only a matter of time.
- And, hey, stop picking on Kellyanne Conway. I suspect my microwave is spying on me, too. The toaster put it up to it. I don’t know what the toaster’s deal is, but the can opener said it’s ticked at me for stuffing an oversized bagel into it. So, OK, jeez, I’m sorry. Can you please stop burning things on purpose now? Appliances can be so temperamental.
- Sean Spicer this week said we can trust that Donald Trump is telling the truth except when he’s joking. So how can we tell when he’s joking? Easy. He’s joking when he gets caught saying something stupid, of course. This isn’t hard, people.
- I feel bad for Spicer. How’d you like your job to be explaining what your boss meant when he said something ridiculous?
- Spicer also said “the president used the word wiretaps in quotes to mean, broadly, surveillance and other activities.” Ah, so we need to interpret the jokes AND the air quotes. Gotcha. Is anyone writing all this down? Lot of rules.
- And, wait, what about his tone? Do we also have to interpret that, too? How about his facial gestures?
- If and when Republicans dismantle the Affordable Care Act, they own it and I don’t want to hear the term Obamacare ever again. The second it’s “repealed and replaced” and Donald Trump signs it, it officially becomes Trumpcare. Can’t wait. (Well, actually, I can. The ACA is a good, if flawed, thing. But we’re getting the government we asked for, good and hard, so it’s going away.)
- The White House keeps saying how awful Obamacare is because it requires people to have health insurance, as if it’s unconscionable for the government to require such a thing. But don’t we all have to buy car insurance? Isn’t that also a law? Why, yes it is. Is that next?
- The Congressional Budget Office, which is run by a Republican, says 14 million will lose health care next year under Trumpcare. The White House says that’s nonsense. And why is it nonsense? Duh. Because they disagree with it.
- Here’s the thing: These are people. If it’s 100 or 14 million, these are people – human beings – who won’t have health insurance. And they’ll be one illness or accident from losing everything. We’re at a point with health care costs that we might just as well turn over our salaries, retirement funds and life savings to the health insurance companies. And maybe the universities. And Wall Street looters. Together, they’re going to own it all someday anyway, so why not just get on with it?
- Stephen Colbert put this whole ACA mess this way: “Yesterday, the speaker of the House and personal trainer who high fives way too hard, Paul Ryan, said ‘Gosh, not as many people will get coverage’ and ‘gee-willikers, I need chemo’ and ‘cheese and crackers, I can’t afford to go to the doctor’ and ‘Holy Toledo, I should have notified my next of kin because, fiddlesticks, I’m dead.’ It doesn’t sound so bad when it’s folksy.”
- “I remain just one thing, and one thing only, and that is a clown. It places me on a far higher plane than any politician.” – Charlie Chaplin.
Image credit: Jack Lawrence