There was a 40-vehicle pile-up on U.S. 31 near Muskegon Friday. Police blamed the usual suspects: speed and stupidity.
“You’ve got to take it slow,” a local police chief said. “When people get on the highway and the speed limit is 70 miles an hour people think they can drive 70.”
Which is a stunning quote considering the freeway was covered with snow and ice, from the photos I’ve seen. Were people really driving 70 in those conditions? If so, holy cow, people, what’s wrong with you?
Afterward, my friend Rick posted an interesting question about people and winter driving: “Are advancements like all-wheel-drive, anti-lock brakes and winter tires making us too confident behind the wheel? Are our driving skills degrading? Or am I just wrong about all of this?”
No, he’s not wrong. Modern safety equipment and sheer vehicle size, I think, can be contributing factors to foul weather accidents, oddly enough, because they convince some drivers they’re more in control and invulnerable than they really are.
I call these drivers “Masters of the Universe.” They’re usually (but not always) male. And they almost always drive SUVs and pickup trucks the size of aircraft carriers. Because their vehicles weigh more and usually have all the attributes and gizmos Rick mentioned, Masters of the Universe tend to drive more aggressively than others, especially in cruddy conditions. Woe to you if get in their way, for they love to tailgate, love to zoom past you on icy roads, and love to flip you off as they go by because, after all, they are, well, Masters of the Universe and you, frankly, are not.
I experienced it first-hand again yesterday, the same day as the Muskegon accident. Despite the dodgy weather, I was out trying to drive my son to Grand Rapids over an ice-covered two-lane road. Traffic was creeping along at 35 mph at best. A powerful east wind kept trying to shove my little vehicle off the road. It was a white knuckle drive, for sure.
Sure enough, though, despite conditions, every few miles a Master of the Universe with “4×4” painted on his tailgate or quarter panel would decide enough was enough and go zooming past the quarter mile string of lesser cars, including my own, that was in his way. Each time, I would struggle to keep my little vehicle centered in the narrow strip of blacktop that was visible, a job made harder by the twister of snow kicked up by their passing. It was a nerve-wracking experience. And that’s from a guy who grew up in the Upper Peninsula and is, if I do say so myself, a fairly good and experienced winter driver.
The odd thing is, I’ve never met a Master of the Universe who thinks he’s a Master of the Universe. They think their behavior is normal and it’s everyone else who’s the problem. It doesn’t seem to occur to them that other people might be intentionally driving more slowly in crappy conditions because they’re not piloting aircraft carriers with 4-wheel drive and snow tires. Or they might be driving, as my daughter does, a 20-year Honda Accord that isn’t all that great in the snow.
It also doesn’t seem to occur to them that other drivers might not be as wonderfully gifted as they are behind the wheel. They might be young, for instance, and be a little nervous driving in the snow. They might be older. Or have disabilities. Or maybe they’re not feeling well. Or maybe they’re on the way back from a funeral and not quite driving with a spring in their step, so to speak. Or bringing a baby home for the first time.
Masters don’t seem to care. To them, the rest of us are obstacles, not human beings. Getting to where they’re going a few seconds faster matters more to them than anything else, including you or me.
Masters of the Universe aren’t the only ones, of course. Most of us drive like them on occasion. We all have a little Master in us, me included. But the older I get, the more conscious I am of how fragile life is. So I’m trying to do a better job of remembering there are people – living, breathing human beings – in every one of those tin cans out on the road.
And every one of those people mean the world to someone somewhere.
Image credit: edward stojakovic
Note: The photo used is not from the Muskegon accident. Just a representative photo of crappy winter driving.
Masters of the Universe is a good term for those idiots.
I test and evaluate vehicles for a living for a manufacturer. I spend my work days driving the roads of southeastern Michigan and am in anything from an economy car to a Master of the Universe vehicle. All require caution in crappy weather.
The only thing I enjoy about winter driving, other than it is pretty at times, is the satisfaction of seeing a Master of the Universe that passed me ten or so minutes before at a crazy speed for conditions sitting in a ditch or against a guard rail down the road. I had that happen twice yesterday in a 30 mile stretch of northbound US-23 yesterday.
Be careful out there folks and stay away from the Masters of the Universe. Even if you have to take an exit for a minute to get them off your butt.
I’ve done that, Gregoire (cool name, btw). I just try to get out of their way.
Andy, you are so right on this. As a volunteer driver for the VA, I drive I94 to Ann Arbor every Wednesday. Every 5 minutes or so one of these geniuses will zip by, throwing slush, snow, and whatever over all of the rest of us poor slobs. What a pleasure to see either them in a ditch, against a guard rail, or better yet, the Michigan State Police sitting behind them with lights flashing. YES! Then my day is complete! Happy New Year to you and yours!
It doesn’t happen often enough, though, does it?
Masters of the Universe are narcissistic to the core. They are driven by a sense of superior self importance, invincibility and entitlement. The rules don’t apply to them, and their consideration for others is non-existent. They don’t own and drive those big 4x4s for the same reasons most people do. Instead, their reasons are about asserting their dominance on those around them, while flaunting their success in your face. There are many Masters of the Universe in the world and they are not our friends.
And yet they walk among us – even here on the website!
Your description of a narcissists fits liberals like you. Liberals think that they know more and are better type of person. Like obamma and hilliary, they think that they are superior to everyone else.
They use phrases like “a basket of deplorables, clutching bitterly to God guns and the Bible.”
The believe that laws and rules do not apply to them. That they are above the law of the land and the Constitution.
Liberals believe in equality that the Constitution guarantees. You do not.
No fred. Liberals do not believe in equality. They really want a king instead of a elected president.
If liberals really believed in the Constitution they would not be having hissy fits over the 2nd Amendment.
There would not be a movement to suppress free speech on college campuses.
Liberals cannot tolerate speech that does not line up with there views.
If a radical liberal came to a conservative college campus to speak, republicans students would not protest that persons speech. They just would not attend the event or cause a riot.
If a conservative speaker is scheduled to speak at a liberal college like the following: UCLA, UC Berkely and a lot of other liberal colleges across this land. The liberals get outrage and riot about the speaker.. They will protest, cause general mayhem and storm the stage to silence the speaker.
fred, if you think that you can refute this,please do so. I do not think that you can. You will do your usual nasty comments and that is all that you are capable of doing.
You are a liar.
Refute what? Nothing you said has any basis in fact. It’s just alt. right nonsense you made up your mind to believe. Nothing I say or do is going to change that. I will just resort to exposing how stupid you are, so the rest of the world can see that.
That “Free Speech” you are so content on protecting is actually hate speech that encourages discrimination against other human beings who you believe do not deserve equality. If liberals didn’t care about other people, then why the heck do liberals like me stand up against people like you in effort to protect other people who we care about for no reason other than they are human beings who deserve to be treated as such? Can you refute that Jim III?
Jim-Bob the Third, you are deplorable! Why must you jump in, and try to turn this article about bad drivers into a political thing? I particularly deplore the fact that you made interminable, cliche replies to early posts here, discouraging readers from finding the good replies that came well before your jump-ins.
The US 31 pile up had nothing to do with your supposed “Master of the Universe” claims. There was a sudden white out squall which led to several vehicles piling up in a matter of less than three minutes. It was not caused by people in 4X4 vehicles. Almost every vehicle in the pile up was a sedan like yours Andy. There were some mini vans and trucks as well but most of the carnage was made up of sedans.
You cry a lot about people who drive 4X4 vehicles. Don’t you basically repost this same rant year after year? Didn’t you cry about 4X4 vehicles in your columns decades ago, way back when you were employed regularly by the Flint Journal? I bet you think of 4X4 vehicles as “assault vehicles” with “fully automatic transmissions” and “high capacity fuel tanks”.
Some of us have driven 4X4 vehicles for over 40 years with zero accidents. How many times has your high and mighty arse piled up your sedans in the last 40 years?
Maybe the problem isn’t 4X4 vehicles or their owners Andy. Maybe the real problem is your extreme self love combined with irrational fear of 4X4 vehicles. Maybe you regularly “white knuckle it” on snowy roads because you are driving outside of your skill envelope and vehicle capabilities.
One of my New Year’s wishes is for all humans across the planet earth to learn to tolerate one another.
That includes you also Working Dad, life is too short, let up a little and don’t be so antagonistic.
Happy New Year everyone……. you too Working Dad!
Spoken like a true Master of the Universe.
*starting slow clap*
Another duplicate (fake) account…. So much credibility….
This seems to have struck a raw nerve with you. His article is spot on. If you are cautious, then this isn’t about you.
Yet another fake account… You have a ton of free time on your hands, don’t you? How many hours per week do you spend making up fake accounts?
Dad, forgot you meds again? If Andy agreed with every idiot idea and take on things you would just disagree with that also. You’re ramblings are useless. Why don’t you just find some alt right blog so you can fit in? You sure don’t here.
Working Dad – Did you even read the last two paragraphs????
Keep writing Andy…your message will save lives! Thank you.
Daddie! You are just contrary, no matter what! Andrew’s post is about bad drivers. Not so much about their vehicles. If you never have accidents, as you wrote, you must be a good driver. He was not writing about you. Please take it easy.
Think I hit a “Hey, wait, that’s me” nerve with Working Dad, eh? It’s not the 4×4, it’s how they drive, like no one else matters.
I never said what the pileup was caused by, nor suggested it. Not sure what you’re reading or referring to, but I suspect it’s not this column. Wild guess: You ARE a master of the universe and recognized yourself, right? And how would a 4×4 be an assault vehicle? And I’m a very good snow driver. I grew up doing it. It was a white knuckle because of the conditions and the Masters. Any chance you were out on that road? Hmmm?
Your whole “Masters of the Universe” comment about 4X4 owners is nothing more that uneducated bigotry. You do not know the mentality of persons you have never met, simply due to the fact they drive a 4X4 vehicle. You cannot factually speak to driving habits of people you have never met.
Again – You comments are nothing but uninformed bigotry. Do you have any additional preconceived prejudices Andy? Old people? Black people? Asian drivers? Female drivers?
You poor little victim. Do you need a tissue, snowflake?
Fred, I believe you used the wrong term when addressing “WD.” Snowflakes can be beautiful. Wouldn’t “Dandruff Flake” be more descriptive?
Hey. Now that’s not nice. Working Dad is sensitive. He is fragile.
I ask Andy – How many vehicle collisions have you been part of? In 41 years of driving, I have never once been in a crash. I have owned over a dozen 4X4 vehicles in that time. How many crashes for you and your sedans Andy?
You continue to miss Andy’s point. And what exactly is your point? So defensive……
You are the best you have the best you have never done anything wrong. You make millions on your 401k. You are always right. You are perfect. So why do you care???!
Never been in a crash, but how many have you caused?? Just sayin………
Get a grip, man! I drove US 31 for forty years to get to work. On bad days, the right lane was filled with people who drove according to road conditions, while the Masters of the Universe flew by us doing 70-75 mph creating whiteouts. Most of them did drive 4×4’s and huge SUVs. They created more chaos when they exited, cutting through right lane traffic. If you watch the video link I sent to Andy, you will see far more SUVs and trucks piling into the ditch than you will sedans. You will also see some responsible drivers in trucks and SUVs totally in control.
Hubby, myself and our son were driving back from the Soo the day after Christmas. Between the bridge and Gaylord, there were whiteout conditions. Some Jackwagon of the Universe in a little Mustang flew by us like he was driving a jet plane. I sooooo wanted to see him on the side of the road, or against a guardrail, or in the median……I don’t wish anyone bodily harm, even if they are an idiot, but it sure would have been satisfying to see. Who drives a Mustang in the winter in northern Michigan anyway??
Just another example of the ‘us vs them’ syndrome permeating our society and the world in general. Fast vs slow, big vs little, Democrats vs Rep, the U vs State… Why can’t we all get along? It’s not what’s in it for me, it’s all about the greater good and common courtesy!
Right on, Andrew. My two cents: Many of these bad winter drivers are from the South. They have no winter driving experience. On I-196, last week, in lake-effect snow, twice, I had people tailgate me, and then zoom around, in the left lane. Both of them had Texas license plates!
A lot of the bad drivers that I see on snowy roads are from Michigan. I do see a few out of state plates once in a while. Those that I have seen are usually driving safely as they can. They are not flying down the road doing 70 mph. Yes, there are a few drivers from out of state who drive foolishly.
Andy,
Here is video of that pile up by Muskegon. It was shot by someone who was already in the median. Don’t know if you will get his audio, but he comments on why people aren’t slowing down. https://www.facebook.com/eagletowingrecovery/videos/1912198468795055/
Mother Goose stayed around for the winter:
Daddy, Daddy, quite contrary
Why are you a “genial” Joe?
Cause it’s lots of fun to malign and bash
When they’re all lined up in a row.
We saw a few Masters yesterday. haha Im a native Michigander, but I live in NC. I came home for the holidays in my Mustang!! I have to drive home tomorrow. Hopefully I won’t run into any Masters or their aircraft carriers on the road.
For almost two years my wife and I had to make repeated trips from the Middle of the Mitten to A2. After the first 4 or 5 trips we were getting a bit bored, so we started keeping track of the 10 worst drivers we saw on each trip. After the first couple of tries we began to doubt our results. Were we just being prejudiced against a certain group? (A group we had belonged to many times over the years.) So, we began to be very critical of our choices. The results did not change. In over 20 trips, 9 out of every 10 of the most idiotic/stupid/careless/rude drivers we saw–were driving 4 wheel drive trucks. (Don’t ask us why, but almost 7 out of 10 were Fords.) This varied very little over nearly 8 seasons. So when someone starts griping about “idiots in 4X4s” being unfairly targeted, we wish we had kept the package.
That’s really interesting. From my eight years of commuting, I would say your experience is the same as mine. It’d be fascinating to see a pie chart/psychological profile of the people who buy 4x4s.
I just realized that Working Dad is a Humanitarian Genius, possibly a True Prophet. Today, he made us all realize that we are guilty of prejudice against poor, darling, defenseless 4X4 drivers. From now on, I understand that we would be better off if we all drove like Republicans, and parked all our Democratic cars in our own driveways every winter.
Yikes!
Today, Jan 3rd, 2018 the road conditions were very slick. I passed 12 car crashes today. (Mostly on I75) 100% of the vehicles involved in these crashes were sedans.
Proof positive that sedan drivers are truly the people who think they are “Masters of the Universe”
Not one, single 4X4 truck or SUV was involved in any event.
That is what happens when you run them off the road in your 4×4. Put your glasses on and try to read Andrew’s column again without letting your emotions get in the way.
Andrew, Working Dad, and Jim the 3rd: I have a MUCH bigger Nuclear Button in my little Chevy than you guys have in your fancy SUVs!
On TV, they just showed head-shots (photos – nothing to do with head-shooting) of Trump and Jim Jong Oon III. These two guys have the worse-looking two haircuts in the world, maybe the worst two haircuts in history. And… They both have nuclear buttons! I wish I could send them both to Janet, my barber. She certainly could make their nuclear hair look a lot better.