Andrew Heller

Best. Columnist. Ever.

  • About
  • More Posts …
    • More Posts …
    • Come Heller high water
    • The Heller Poll
    • Steve Jessmore photos
    • Auchtoons
  • Books
 

Isn’t it time for presidential candidates to start acting presidential?

March 12, 2016 by Andrew Heller 12 Comments

Courtesy: Donkey Hotey
Courtesy: Donkey Hotey

I cringed when Sen. Marco Rubio said of Donald Trump at a campaign rally recently, “I’ll admit … he’s taller than me, he’s like 6 feet, 2 inches, which is why I don’t understand why his hands are column photo suitthe size of someone who’s 5 feet, 2 inches – and you know what they say about men with small hands. You can’t trust ‘em!”

Yes, in case you aren’t sure that was the first male appendage joke in U.S. presidential campaign history, as far as I’m aware. (It’s hard to imagine Lincoln telling people “I wouldn’t vote for Douglas because from what I hear his Master John Goodfellow is more like a Master John Tragically Sad Fellow – wink, wink, nudge, nudge.”) (Master John Goodfellow, by the way, is an actual 17th Century euphemism – you can look it up.)

The crowd cracked up at Rubio, but I’ll bet inside a lot of them were thinking the same thing I was: “Is this fourth-grade recess or a presidential campaign?”

Or maybe not, it could just be me. I’m told I’m old-fashioned about a lot of things.

I don’t think there should be commercials on TV for medicines that solve the apparently endless woes associated with going to the bathroom. Listen, if we need the stuff, we know where to get it,OK!

I think men should hold doors open for ladies.

I think gas stations should go back to full serve.

And I think presidential candidates should be better than us. Otherwise, why are we voting for them?

This has nothing to do with my feelings about Rubio, by the way, or the fact that he’s a Republican and I usually vote Democrat. I’d say the same thing if, God forbid, Hillary or Bernie stooped as low.

I don’t want a president who stoops, period — Democrat or Republican. I want a president who is above that kind of behavior. I really do.

I can hear some of you now: “Well, Trump started it!”

Yeah, well, like my mom used to say, that doesn’t mean Rubio had to finish it. By descending to Trump’s level, he cheapened himself and hurt himself with voters, in my view.

Of course, his campaign views it differently, according to a Washington Post piece this week: “Marco Rubio has been gamely experimenting with a new strategy, attempting to outdo Donald Trump in his own carnivalesque reality TV arena. Rubio has suggested that Trump urinated in his pants backstage at last week’s debate, presumably meaning that Trump lost control of his bladder in a fit of terror over the Florida Senator’s withering attacks. Rubio has also ridiculed Trump’s ‘horrible spray tan.’ Rubio has even mocked Trump’s ‘small hands’ … One Rubio adviser explained Rubio’s descent into the lowest of lowbrow Trumpian antics by claiming, ‘We came to the conclusion that if being a part of the circus is the price you have to pay in order for us to ultimately be able to talk about substantive policy, then that’s what we’re going to do.’”

So this was planned juvenile behavior.

Which somehow makes it worse.

Call me old-fashioned, but that is simply not presidential.

 

Filed Under: National politics

Comments

  1. Sue says

    March 12, 2016 at 8:09 am

    Old fashioned..not at all. Our nation needs steady, thoughtful, inspirational leadership. Whatever the Republican Party is devolving into is not leadership. Would the adults please grab these “boys” by the ears and show them the door? BTW Christie wasn’t a surprise but Ben Carson’s endorsement of Trump….I have no words.

    Reply
    • ssurfcity says

      March 12, 2016 at 10:15 am

      Thank you, well said.

      Reply
  2. Ernie Davis says

    March 12, 2016 at 9:18 am

    Dr. Carson knows what America needs! It’s time for all of us to be Americans, not Republicans or Democrats or we are all lost.

    Reply
  3. lindas1725 says

    March 12, 2016 at 9:19 am

    At first I thought these debates were maybe a little comic relief, reality show style, and then they would get down to the serious business of the issues affecting our country and the entire world. Time is marching on my friends, Mr. Trump is many points ahead; Former Presidents of this great nation are turning over in their graves. We should be afraid, very very afraid.

    Reply
  4. jbcsfljbcsfl says

    March 12, 2016 at 10:00 am

    No Andy, you are not old fashioned…….. you are truthful.
    You are correct, the GOP debates this year have been a fourth grade recess…… a total embarrassment.
    I have seen Mr. Trump on TV for many years, I always thought he came across as a bully and a blowhard, I am now convinced that he is.
    Kasich is the only GOP candidate acting presidential, the other three have turned into a laughing stock for daily ridicule in the press and denouncement around the world.
    Hillary or Bernie will trounce whoever survives the GOP sandbox, it looks like Trump will be the one.
    The Grand Ole Party is not so grand anymore, they are imploding right before our eyes.

    Reply
  5. Kathy says

    March 12, 2016 at 10:48 am

    The next time Trump begins his antics at a debate, the other candidates should walk off stage, the moderators should follow, and they should find a room with a lock on the door and continue the debate without him. All it would take is one cameraman to follow.

    Reply
  6. vince castellanos says

    March 12, 2016 at 2:18 pm

    right on

    Reply
  7. Tony says

    March 12, 2016 at 3:20 pm

    The GOP is a joke! I can see Chris Christie joining the trump revolution but not Ben Carson. What was been thinking?

    Reply
  8. Elaine Folger says

    March 12, 2016 at 4:27 pm

    Hear!Hear! The GOP has become a bad joke. At least they would be if Trump wasn’t so scary. The latest rally (cancelled) due to violence was inevitable. He incites hatred & violence, then steps back and let’s others go off the rails. He reminds me a lot of how Hitler started out. That frightens me. I hope it frightens people enough to get them out to vote for other candidates.

    Reply
  9. Sue says

    March 12, 2016 at 7:17 pm

    I agree with all. Today the Trump supporters are blaming the problems at the Trump rallies on the Liberals. Saying this is what the liberals always do. Trump and his cadre are not taking any of the blame. Grrrrr. I do think the Democratic candidates and organizations need to look at what need Trump is filling with so many people instead of attacking him, they need to address these needs. They will get nowhere attacking Trump.

    Reply
  10. Tom Neely says

    March 12, 2016 at 8:52 pm

    Hey, guys… Trump is just defending our First Amendment right to beat the snot out of anybody we do not agree with. That’s America! Free Speech, Free Fists! God bless America!

    Reply
  11. Barb Rheinhardt says

    March 14, 2016 at 1:32 pm

    Well said. The whole campaign is comic at best and frightening at worst.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Buy My Books!

Show_Cars_Illustrated_300x250-2018

 

Archives

  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • October 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016

Categories

  • All Columns
  • Auchtoons
  • Brenda Brissette Mata columns
  • Come Heller high water
  • Flint Columns
  • Guest columnists
  • Guns
  • Humor
  • John Matonich
  • Michigan politics and government
  • National politics
  • Steve Jessmore photos
  • Steve Murch
  • The Heller Poll
  • What do you think?

About The Author

Andrew Heller has been an enduringly popular newspaper columnist in Michigan for a long, long, long time. He wrote his first column for the Escanaba Daily Press way back in 1979. It was about his … Continue Reading

SOCIAL

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter

BOOK: Come-Heller-High-Water-by-Andrew-Heller ISBN-13:9780964983212

Come Heller High Water I is the collection readers asked for, and includes columns that they wanted reprints of.

In true Heller style, topics cover everything from the craziness of having kids to tales from his U.P. days.

Buy My Books!

BOOK: Come-Heller-High-Water 2-by-Andrew-Heller ISBN-13:9780964983212

Come Heller High Water II is the smash hit follow-up to Come Heller High Water I. It includes everything from Andy's takes on modern life to conversations with his back home pal Moon Dimple, and much, much more.
 

Buy My Books!

BOOK: Saving the World One Column at a Time Paperback  ISBN-10: 0971495114 ISBN-13: 978-0971495111

Saving the World One Column at a Time is a bitingly funny look at the world through the eyes of this award-winning columnist. In it he takes on corporate crooks, Little League parents, tongue piercers, ketchup sinners and much, much more. A must-have for Heller fans.

Buy My Books!

Copyright © 2025 · Andrew Heller · Best. Columnist. Ever.

Mobile Responsive Website by Media Cafe Online, LLC · Log in