Come Heller high water …
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, just because Trump ratcheted down the hate a bit doesn’t mean his State of the Union was presidential, hopeful or optimistic, as some are saying. It was none of those things. What I heard was a guy grossly overstating the nation’s problems – terrorism, violent crime, unemployment, immigration, trade, foreign affairs etc. – so no matter what he does it’ll appear things are magically better. Creating false realities is a standard Trump ploy. But he doesn’t get away with it on my watch. No sir! The truth is things are vastly improved after eight years of Obama. Trump doesn’t get to claim his credit.
And don’t give me this nonsense about how he’s going to increase military spending by $54 billion, invest a trillion dollars in infrastructure and spend $15 to $25 billion on a wall all while lowering the deficit and cutting everyone’s taxes. That’s ridiculous.- And did you hear his howler about how 94 million Americans are out of the labor force. That’s actually true, according to the Associated Press, but that figure includes retirees, high school and college students, and parents staying home with their kids. So it wasn’t a lie, but it was an alternative fact, to be sure. Someone oughta tell him about fact-checkers.
- A news report said Michigan State Police are cracking down on left lane lurkers. I doubt it but I’m all in favor if it’s true. Left lane drivers are second on Andy’s Great Big List of Annoying Things You People Do on the Road. First is tailgating. Or not parking within the lines. Or people who self-righteously block a lane that ends in a mile. Or just existing and getting in my way. It depends on the day.
- But here’s what I don’t get: If someone is going the speed limit in the left lane, is it legal to go faster than the speed limit to pass them?
- Oprah Winfrey hinted that she might run for president in 2020. Cue the “You get an entitlement, and YOU get an entitlement, and YOU get an entitlement” jokes. But, listen, I’d take her over Trump any day. Or Hillary, for that matter.
- Would that make Stedman the nation’s first Significant Other?
- Good Housekeeping magazine, which, to my amazement still exists, says the “appledoodle” is Michigan’s most delicious cookie. Um, not to be picky or anything but shouldn’t a cookie that’s supposedly Michigan’s best be something people in Michigan have heard of? I certainly haven’t and I’m a cookie connoisseur.
- As the newly self-appointed GM of the Detroit Tigers, I hereby release Mike Pelfrey and Anibel Sanchez and anoint Mikie Mahtook the everyday centerfielder. You’re welcome, Tigers fans.
- 90-72. That’s their record this season. Mark it down. Unless I’m wrong, then I’ll deny I ever said it.
- I’m not a violent guy, but the commercial where a woman with positively fluorescent teeth shames her friend, who also has positively fluorescent teeth, into using whitening strips makes me want to smack someone. Anyone who uses those things ought to watch the old “Friends” episode where Ross whitens his teeth first.
- “We accept the love we think we deserve.” – Stephen Chbosky.
So can we bring this column back up at the end of September when the regular season is done? ?
I will take any advice you have about baseball. Thank you for the sane response to last night’s address. After 8, not entirely perfect, years of elegant and considered and thoughtful leadership, I shudder on a daily basis.
Oprah! Why in heck didn’t she run? Could have saved us a lot of trouble.
And where in heck did you find someone in the left lane actually running at the speed limit? In most cases if you are running over the speed limit in the right lane you are holding up traffic.
So, A-Hell, does anybody channel your great comments up to the big-time commenters? Your first few bullets today are right-the-heck-on. You are a big-leaguer trapped in a Triple-A situation. Do any of the national TV networks or NPR ever call you to comment?
Ha, no, but they should. I keep telling everyone I’m brilliant.
Andy, in regards to your question about those left lane huggers, State Hwy Patrol told me you can go 10 miles over the limit to pass but then you have to merge back right. This is in Georgia.
As I have said many times before here, you will be very satisfied in less than 2 or 3 years when all of President Trump’s list has been completed. With or without Democrats help.
“The truth is things are vastly improved after eight years of Obama. ”
WHAT!!!!!! If that were true Trump would never have been elected.
I accept that you are a Democrat or as they like to say “Progressive” so I don’t expect to agree with some things you say but this remark was so untrue I had to say something!
Love your other stuff though.
Oh, Andy, you’re such a pot stirrer.
Andy, I have been a fan since you first came to Flint but I’m going to stop reading your “editions”. Instead of humorous observations and Heller opinions as your columns once were, they have become mean spirited RANTS against Trump and the Republican party. And if not political, still negative. This not the way I choose to start my day.
I appreciate the thoughts. But I don’t think I’m any less tongue in cheek. I’ve always just called ’em like I see ’em and this party and this president are deserving everything they get. Hope you come back at some point.
Ninety-four million is approximately 29% of the 319 million Americans. Notice how he used a large number versus a percentage when speaking of people out of the labor force (not to mention his not using the unemployment rate). Too many people do not comprehend large numbers, so they are more easily deceived. Saying ninety-four million leaves people think “too many people not working,” whereas 29% would give people pause to wonder, “huh?”
I regularly ask my college students to draw a line (about six inches), mark the left end zero and the right end as one-trillion, and then put a mark on the line where they think one-billion is located. The typical mark made by them is located somewhere just left of center. Then we have a lesson on the powers of ten…
I have enjoyed the documentary “Powers of Ten” as a visual display of magnitude.
29% of Americans not working is horrible. Ninety four million Americans out of 319 million not working is horrible. One billion would be 1/1000 of the distance moving left to right across your described line.
What am I failing to understand?
It is because a lot of individuals have confusion with number sense, the reason that many sixth graders think that 1/1000 is greater than 1/2 because 1000 is more than 2. Comprende?
FYI, I was born during WW2, which means I am a part of that horrible 29% . I choose not to work and along with my contemporaneous friends are enjoying being a part of that yuuuge group of 94 million people.
As a devoted “Cookie lady”, I agree with you. What is an Appledoodle? Never heard of it. Never saw a recipe for it. Better track this one down Andy. We might be missing something great.
Never heard of it, either!
A leopard doesn’t change its spots, which means that Trump’s character, especially because it is bad, will not change, even if he pretends it has.
Andrew are you realy so delusional that you think things are better after 8 years of the former president and the democrats controlling CONgress?
Let us see… the national debt was about $9 trillion dollars or so when the former president took office in 2009. At the end of his term is was about $19 trillion or so. I do not see that as an improvement.
I can understand why your wife will not let you have the checkbook.
When President Trump spoke at his inauguration speech he used the word I three times. He used the word “we” more than 50 times.
The former president rarely, if ever, used the word “we”. He always used the term “I”. He was always patting himself on the back..
Gun deaths and injuries in Chicago have gone up,and this is in a city that has very strict gun laws.
President Trump promised that he we deport illegal immigrants that are committing crimes and other illegal actions. He has given ICE free reign to go after them. And ICE is starting to do that.
If you think that is a bad idea why don’t you invite some of those illegal immigrants to stay at your house? I am sure using liberal logic that you will have a pleasant time with them.
I am also on your side when it comes to an “appledoodle” I have never heard of such a cookie.
My wife and I have also never heard of an appledoodle. It may be a variation on the snicker doodle which is not made with Snickers by the way. Anoth er one of those commercials which makes you dissatisfied with your present situation is the one where if you don’t think that your house smells, it means you have gone “nose blind”… Brilliant! – Gladstone Bob