Before he was impeached (man, that feels good to say), Trump tweeted out his rage about the “radical left,” which he apparently defines as all Democrats.
That phrase struck a chord with me. I’ve supported Democrats my whole life with the exception of my first presidential election when I think I voted for independent John Anderson because Ronald Reagan scared me and Jimmy Carter, well, 1979-1980 was a bleak time in America. Everyone was confused.
But I have never once thought of myself as “radical” or even as a “leftie.” I’m way too boring for either label. Most of my views, I like to think, are centrist or at the very least more or less mainstream Democrat.
For instance, I believe that:
- There should have been at least 112 more articles of impeachment against Trump, including one for “just being a jerk.”
- Politicians should obey the law and work for the people (clarification for my Republican friends: I mean the American people).
- We should help the poor, feed the hungry and house the homeless.
- Health care is a right. Everyone should have it, and not just (as Republicans like to say when they’re trying to sound like they give a shit) “access” to it. Everyone, of course, has “access” to health care. What they don’t have is the ability to “pay” for it. Also, I think it’s the height of wrong that, insurance or not, the vast majority of us are a single accident or illness from economic disaster. It’s as if the health-care industry really owns our savings. We’re just keeping it for them until something happens.
- The government shouldn’t kidnap immigrant children and if they do, the people responsible should be tried and convicted.
- Immigrants are the backbone of this country. It baffles me how anyone can be against immigration in a nation built entirely on and by immigrants. We’re all immigrants. Every one of us, including the people who hate immigrants.
- Deficits are to be avoided when possible and kept as small as necessary when needed.
- The only good martinis are gin martinis. Vodka martinis are a disgrace to the art of drinking. (I realize this has nothing to do with the subject matter today but I felt a need to say it.)
- Slavery was deeply wrong and the symbols and heroes of the Confederacy are not part of our “heritage” to be celebrated and perpetuated. They’re part of our dark past and should be left there.
- We can and should regulate guns.
- Mitch McConnell stealing Obama’s last SCOTUS pick will set a precedent that Republicans will come to regret.
- Teachers deserve massive pay increases and an apology from the GOP, which has demonized them for decades now because of the teacher unions.
- Women should choose, not men. Period. If men got pregnant, you can be damned sure they’d have that right. Damn sure.
- The rich do, in fact, own the government and tilt our entire economic system in their favor. All you have to do is compare wages for workers and CEOs over the past 40 years. We live in a plutocracy, which is a fancy word for a country where the wealthy are in charge and the rest of us get the scraps.
- Climate change is ridiculously, obviously and patently real. So real I can’t believe I even have to say this.
- Science is fact, not opinion. (Again, why does this need to be said?)
- The earth is round, vaccines are safe, we landed on the moon and Bigfoot (regrettably) doesn’t exist. (If Bigfoot did exist, you can be sure we’d have hunted or deforested his kind into extinction by now anyway.)
- Women should be paid the same as men.
- Oil and gas pipelines don’t belong underwater.
- Children deserve good schools.
- Everyone should have a minimum of four weeks vacation.
- Russia and North Korea are enemies not friends.
- The only true best Christmas movie is “Christmas Story.”
- White supremacists are the biggest domestic threat to this country and should be considered Public Enemy No. 1.
- Crash Davis (“Bull Durham”) was spot-on when he said he believed in “the soul… the small of a woman’s back… the hangin’ curveball… high fiber… good scotch… that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent overrated crap… I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a Constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.” (Exception: I don’t really think Oswald acted alone. I think the mob did it. Really. But then I watch a lot of History Channel, so … ) (And, yes, I omitted a few racy things from the quote. I blush easily.)
- Election Day should be a national holiday and people should pay a fine if they don’t vote. If they don’t vote twice in a row, they are subject to a stern lecture from my mother. And believe me, you don’t want that.
I like to think that most Americans – Democrats or Republicans – would agree with most of what I just wrote, with the clear exceptions of abortion and gun control. And maybe that gin thing.
But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe America has stayed the same and I’m the one who’s changed. Maybe I am, as Trump says, a “radical.”
You tell me. Please let me know in the comment section.
While you’re at it, add a few things that you believe in as well.
Maybe we’ll find some common ground.
Andy, I am always surprised at how much I agree with you on most things. Of course we both went to CMU, my dad worked at the same newspaper as you and we are almost the same age (I’m older). Great column.
Agree on all counts except best Christmas movie, but in the spirit of the season, I won’t quibble.
I believe an essential duty of both parties and all citizens is to protect the integrity of our elections. That includes the elimination of the electoral college.
I believe that presidential appointees, most especially cabinet secretaries and agency heads, should be chosen based on experience and competence in the actual purpose of their department, and not appointed to subvert or dismantle it.
I believe both parties should agree to require a year—or perhaps two, and NO exceptions—of “national service”, which would include a form of basic military training. (I have never met a conservative who disagreed even slightly with this; I believe the only disagreement comes from Congress, who don’t want their own little Winstons and Muffys to get their hands dirty and associate with other young people who are . . . “not like them”.)
I believe everything you’ve written, plus what Rick wrote. I’ve voted in every election since I was old enough and find it unbelievable that so many Dems don’t turn out when the weather is bad. I’m hoping that will change this coming election after the catastrophe of the last one.
I believe instead of supporting food pantries and Red Kettle drives we should demand essential support come from our taxes.
Along with this I also believe many tax exempt groups should loose that status.
i also agree with you on all you said . But i would like to add we must change the way we elect a president . Seems like trying to accept a election where the person who gets the most votes is the loser Iam sorry its unacceptable . I think most people can accept a proper election where the winner is the person with the most votes . kinda a weird and out dated way to elect a president. And it also has hurt us in a lot of ways in a few elections recently . Good pt of view Andy always find your thoughts interesting .
The Electoral College has to go.
I think most people do agree with these things but they are unwilling to pay higher taxes to support them because they are comfortable and selfish.
Then they really don’t believe it, do they. I’m tired of Republicans saying they’re “for” things in principle but don’t help find an answer.
Oh, that awful Trump. After this, let us swear him off for a holiday week.
1. In his speech last week, Trump started with a GREAT hour-long comedy routine. No Democrat can match that.
2. In the second hour, Trump said all the exactly same stuff he said four years ago: “Immigrants tend to be rapists; we must take health care away from Americans; we need the border wall; tariffs do NOT hurt American farmers; climate change is fake …” Trump has not changed or revised any of his bull-frog. We MUST revise Trump out of our lives.
Now… Please forget about Trump for a couple weeks, and have a great holiday. Merry Christmas, and so on!
Scary . . . I agree 100% with everything you said, although “ It’s a Wonderful Life” is slightly better. If the list could have been longer, outlawing Citizen’s United and Gerrymandering could have been in there. I posted it on Facebook and look forward to my Trump-loving, Democrat-hating cousins’ comments. Keep up the good work.
I agree on most everything, despite throwing a few hanging curves myself. I especially agree on gin. Vodka does not a martini make.
A few? Gotta be a Tanqueray martini, too. With a whisper of good vermouth. And a garlic stuffed olive. No cheese.
Andy, once again, you nailed it!
Merry Christmas!
Happy New Year to you and the formidable Marcia!
Vote in 2020!
Halleluja! Finally, someone, I can agree with 100%. Thanking God for you Andrew. Merry Christmas to you and your family.
Just what jbcsfl said! And to think I used to be a Republican. 🥴
Merry Christmas, everyone!
I’ve read your comments and will comply with my reply. I’m furious. I’ve seen your points about our president, slavery, guns and schools. And how dare you sir. Chrismas Story is a nice movie but not even then the top five. Elf and Lampoon reign supreme.
Hear! Hear! Well said!
I believe in the strength and power of families.
Oh, Andy, I agree. That being said, politics will NOT be a part of our Christmas conversations. Hey, and what about “The Best Christmas Pageant Ever”?
Spot on except for movie. Charlie Brown’s Christmas is the best with a small child watching it with you. Based upon history a plutocracy form of government never ends well for the upper 10%.
I agree as well, Andy and thanks for all you said! I did not vote for Trump and I will never vote Republican again.
I think they’re quietly turning off a lot of people who will never trust Republicans again. They’ve lied, cheated, stolen a SCOTUS seat etc.
I use to read your column all the time and it never failed to provide me with many laughs and chuckles. I truly miss it. That being said, I just want to say that I agree on all of your points, well, except martinis. Can’t agree or disagree as bourbon is my choice of “spirits”.
Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas and a healthy, prosperous and blessed New Year.
Hi, Karen. You don’t have to miss it – I’m still writing weekly here at the website. Make 2020 great!
Andy, This column really made your fans stand up and holler! (This is a good thing.)
While I do not agree with several of the things you state as “facts,” I do believe we could set down with a cold frothy adult beverage (I HATE Martinis) and have a civilized (and mostly fun) discussion. Who knows how much we would discover we had in common. (How about CMU ? Masters ’89) And I would bet neither one of us would resort to yelling. (Ok, maybe at the server for being slow.)
So, I wish you and yours a very happy and rewarding holiday. Hope to see you next year.
The Republicans have enabled, endorsed, and excused his actions, and for that I will never forgive them. I write to as many as possible to let them know that in the past I have voted for the candidate, not the party, but I cannot and will not vote for anyone who has shown support for, or defended Trump.
I agree with almost everything you said–gin is still questionable in my book, but I’m willing to give it another try or two to be sure. I did miss an election a few years back but was sicker than a dog so I’ve switched to absentee ballots just to be guaranteed a vote. I actually worked on Anderson’s campaign, which was my first presidential election. I suspect that he’d be a Democrat today.
Great column, Andy. I agree about Reagan; never trusted the man. Especially since he’s the one who changed health care from its true purpose into a “for profit” organization. Look where that’s gotten us today.
Enjoy all your holidays and keep those column coming; they’re a bright spot of sanity in an increasingly wacko world.
Andy, I can’t believe how much I agree with what you say in your columns. Maybe it’s because you are from da UP and I’m from da Iron Range in Nortern Minnysoda.
I agree wholeheartedly. I’d add that I believe someday we’ll have a president that I can tell my grandkids: “One day you can grow up to be like him/her.” And that would be a good thing.
I am confused about the part of immigration. Are we talking about those who immigrate legally and follow the rules set forth for admission or are we talking about anyone who wants to immigrate to America?
The house democRATS don’t have 1 legitimate article of impeachment, let alone 112. Last week, Pelosi and her clowns clutched pearls while bleating of an URGENT need to remove Trump. This week? No urgency at all. Withholding documents. Stall tactics. Pure political kabuki from Madaam asshole(oops) Madaam Speaker. Speaking of assholes, Heller really should push “being a jerk” as an article of impeachment……..it would be 10x more compelling , arguable and defensible than the current partisan bullshit locked in Nancy’s diaper drawer.
I see mom and dad let brad out of the basement.
I completely agree and you, Sir, are one amazing columnist!! Always look forward to your columns and this time you have said what all the masses who support a Hitler Wannabe need to hear! My only disagreement would be Elf is the best holiday movie while It’s a Wonderful Life is my favorite classic one! Yes! Eliminate the Electoral College which has NEVER made sense. Only the actual popular vote is logical!
I could rant on about how I don’t understand Trump supporters….. oh wait, sure I can. They MUST be racist for nothing else is logical at all!!
May you continue to write this column always!! Happy Holidays ( which means Christmas and New Years that the religious right tell me is awful for me to say) plus I respect those who worship differently. Your Mom raised a great son!! Hug your Spouse because some of us lost ours this year and Christmas is bitter sweet. Thanks again for your BEST EVER column. Vote! Vote! Vote!
I agree on all the political things you listed. I don’t think I’ve ever had a martini so no opinion there, and I don’t watch a lot of Christmas movies so no vote there either. I grew up in a republican family and became an adult in the Nixon era. So I’ve never voted for a republican president. I used to vote for Milliken when he was governor. And my mom switched to the Democrats in her 70s when she saw the direction the Republican Party was heading!
I’m with you
Other Christmas Pageant Roles:
Wise Men: Fred, Jims, Native
Shepherd: OldUg
Angels: Mama Bear, jb
Donkey: Andrew
Uhhh, no donkey in the Christmas story. Surprised, but yup.