Remember the comedian Sam Kinison? It’s fine if you don’t. In fact, I would advise against YouTubing him. (And I disclaim all responsibility if you do.) But back in the 1980s he had a particularly edgy standup bit about world hunger and Western popular reaction to it (Feed the World, USA for Africa, etc.). As was his style, Kinison suckered you in with a low-key, seemingly reasoned assessment of the situation, then, BANG!, smacked you upside the head with a loud, audacious screaming rant. In this case, he went from sympathetically describing the plight of starving people suffering in deserts to highly suggesting they were stupid for not moving to where food can be grown: “WE HAVE DESERTS IN AMERICA, TOO, BUT WE DON’T LIVE IN THEM!!!”
This routine was one of the first things I ever heard described as “politically incorrect.” It most definitely was. But unlike some politicians who “tell it like it is” and “say things others are afraid to say,” Kinison was crossing lines for laughs, not votes. I think that’s an important distinction.
The bit is also funny because it’s wrong. Americans do in fact live in our deserts, and we’ve done nothing but accelerate that population over the past 30 years. Unlike poor countries, we have been able to beat nature with air conditioning and water pumping. Continuing to condition the air is not a big problem. But deserts are deserts by definition because of limited fresh water supplies. It’s no wonder that the parched southwest would cast its thirsty gaze toward our abundant Great Lakes.
I say too bad. We’ve already been kind enough to share our Vernors with the rest of the country. If they want water, they’re gonna have to move here.
John Auchter draws cartoons. Lots and lots of them. You can find them at his incredibly popular website auchtoon.com.
James Stover says
This was a mistake……did our Governer vote for this..after screwing up Flint.
This will lead to more…..
WRONG
John says
Don’t like lack of water? Don’t live in the desert. Don’t like snow? Don’t live in Michigan. Don’t like alligators? Don’t live in Florida.
Bill VanDriessche says
As much as I despise the nerd governor and his continual brain dead, profits over people decisions, I don’t ever see him or the other governors in this region ever allowing the desert southwest states to tap into the Great Lakes…
JimS says
Maybe I don’t quite understand what Great Lakes watershed is or the boundaries. They are 17 miles from the lake and genesee county is approximately 70 miles. Somebody explain to me the difference?
dave ives says
Watershed boundaries are defined by where rainwater ends up. In Flint, water is drained by the Flint River which flows into the Saginaw River which flows into Lake Huron. Waukesha rain, despite being close to Lake Michigan, ends up in the Mississippi River then to the Gulf of Mexico.
Loren M says
All you need to do is look at a map and see which directions the rivers flow to roughly define the Great Lakes watershed. All of Michigan falls in it but it’s easy to see most of our neighbor Ontario drains into the Hudson Bay.
Linda H says
Waukesha knew they had a problem but did nothing to remediate. In fact they let their town continue to grow knowing water access would be a problem. In their earlier petition they wanted access to more than they needed so they could turn around and sell water. This agreement calls for them to treat and return the water. However, there is no condition that requires them to continue remediation efforts. Further, there are many other communities outside the watershed that have been waiting for a precedent so they, too, can file a petition for water. Every major environmental group opposed this move.
Loren M says
Sam Kinison’s rants weren’t just for laughs, he pointed out the incongruous nature of things and purposefully made many people cringe but he also made other people think. It may sound harsh to some people but in this case in my best Sam voice, “If you’re too stupid to move to area that has water, DIE! We’re not going to allow the Great Lakes to be drained until we have no clean fresh water.” Millions of people’s lives depend on our lakes
Oldugly says
One item most folks seemed to have overlooked is that the water UNDER Waukesha, the water they have been pumping for many years, is part of the Great Lakes basin. That water is now unfit to drink. So, unless you have a proposal on how to fix that, this is a good idea.
Of course I am a firm believer that pumping water to the southwest would be a dumb idea. It would be much easier to divert the Mississippi river.