- Saying goodbye to this bizarre and wonderful spate of warm February weather is like saying goodbye to your grown-up kids going back to college and jobs after visiting. “Bye! We’ll miss you! Come back soon! Are you sure you can’t stay? You don’t come home often enough. Do you have enough money? Drive safe! Yes, yes, I know you’re grown-up. Mwuh, mwuh! Bye!” Good weather and visiting kids always leave you wanting more.
- Doesn’t it seem like Trump has been in office for years already? Remember the good old days when facts were facts, Sweden, Bowling Green and Atlanta hadn’t yet been attacked, and 70 percent of the country wasn’t going, “Oh sweet Jesus, what have we done?”
- Polls are polls but I thought the one showing a majority of Americans are embarrassed by Trump was interesting. If asked I’d have said he is embarrassing, and not because he’s a Republican but because he’s, well, embarrassing. For example, I disagreed with Reagan and Bush the 1st but would never have said they were embarrassing. Bush 2 had his embarrassing moments but wasn’t consistently embarrassing. Clinton, too, was occasionally but not consistently embarrassing. To me, that’s the difference. I’d hate to say I was related to this guy if I were. Which I’m not. Let’s be clear on that.
- OK, riddle me this: If the news is so fake, how come Trump keeps watching and reading so much of it?
- Mike Pence spent the week assuring European allies that Trump really doesn’t want to ditch NATO. I guess others in the administration are having to do the same kind of thing. I don’t want to tell them how to do their jobs but wouldn’t it be more efficient to just appoint a “Secretary of Walking Back Dumb Stuff the President Said”? I mean, it’s not like it’s going to stop, right?
- I love all the protest marches. I love that Dems are packing town halls and showing some spirit. It’s long since past due – the center left has been too passive, too nice and too uninvolved for too long. But I didn’t like the name of the “Not My President’s Day” rallies. Sorry, they don’t get off that easy. Trump wasn’t elected because of some Republican tide. He was elected because Democrats – including many of those people who are suddenly awake – either didn’t show up or voted for third party candidates because they didn’t like Hillary. Let’s not forget that.
- Best audience comment I heard at one of the town halls was from a woman who was angry about the coming demise of Obamacare. She said to her Republican lawmaker: “You ask us to be calm, cool and collected. But what kind of insurance do you have?”
- Exactly. (The answer is he has really good insurance paid for by the government. Irony, it doth sting.)
- All of a sudden there’s a flurry of commercials by restaurants and food manufacturers about how they put real food in their food. Which begs the question “What the hell was in there before? I only noticed the commercials because the actors doing the voiceovers don’t say “food,” like you or I would say it. They say “ffffood.” I’m sorry. It bugs me. And, yes, I pay way too close attention for my own good. I need to stop it. By the way, the Panera woman is the biggest offfffender. She sounds like a leaky tire.
- The president of Iceland says if it were up to him pineapple on pizza would be banned. He’s wrong, of course. Pineapple and ham pizzas are delicious. Now if he’d said feta and spinach, I’d be right behind him. Those things on pizza are an abomination and an insult to all that is good and decent.
- “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” -Elbert Hubbard.
Image credit: Magnus Bråth
Johnny J says
Trump is like a bad fever, it either kills you or makes your life hell for a while and then goes away defeated.
And no, pizza is cheese and tomato sauce and Italian sausage. Anything else is faux pizza.
Andrew Heller says
Mmmmm, faux pizza.
Tom says
Trump’s way of speaking: He says everything in a totally assured, totally certain tone. This is the way my dad spoke, and all his contemporaries from the WW2 generation. Even when they did not know what the heck they were talking about, they sounded very authoritative, and they wanted everybody to believe them. American voters seem to be wanting their grandpas, and their grandpas’ way of speaking, way of acting utterly certain about everything. Even though their grandpas were utter bull-froggers.
Marylou Tucker says
Those bull-froggers saved the free world.
Louise Dawson says
I’m hoping Trump’s game will implode, and soon.
Cathy says
Hoping and praying, Louise. Embarrassed for sure, and fearful on so many levels.
Working Dad says
Andy Heller suffers from Trump Derangement Syndrome. I look forward to your continued, tear filled, vagina hat wearing, fake news inspired meltdowns.
More hissy fits Andy…… MORE!
Andrew Heller says
Oh, OK, you talked me into it.
Working Dad says
Bwahahaha!…. The Trump administration is banning lying, liberal “media” outlets with a fake news history from briefings. That is sure to make liberals cry!
Teddy Luba says
Your right about that because that’s what Hitler did.
Working Dad says
“I love all the protest marches. ”
The violent Democrats that riot, attack people and commit arson need to be put down. Two rounds in the torso + one round in the head. Wear your vagina hat all you like Andy, but the violent Democrats are a huge problem and your side is not turning them into law enforcement. Rather your side is helping them to escape capture through obstruction tactics.
Barbara says
I was a life-long Republican until a few years ago. Now, I don’t identify myself as either a Republican or a Democrat, but I do identify myself as a person of integrity, dignity, civility, and genuine wisdom, and I don’t see much of them on either side of the aisle now. Those are the qualities I will be voting for when I find them.
I am hopeful that all citizens will be sufficiently stirred up by the wrongs coming to the surface that they will take whatever action they can within their own sphere of influence to correct them. The key word there is action – not being satisfied with the status quo. And not just complaining, and making empty “noise.”
Love your columns, Andy. Although I’ve moved to Florida, I still never miss ’em!
Barbara says
P.S. Ham, green peppers and pineapple – oh yeah!!
Jim III says
Andrew,
Do you expect us common sense people to trust polls put forth by the major news media?
The same ones that supposedly showed that hilliary that a commanding lead over President Trump in the election. That hilliary would win the election very easily over President Trump?
I am not happy with some of the things that President Trump has done. However, he is trying to enforce the laws that are on the books.
Remember it was the democrats that passed obama scam act. No Republican had voted for it.
It was the democrats that exempted themselves from coverage. It was the former president that issued a bunch of EO’s that exempted a lot of democratic donating companies from the obama scam act. Remember that it was Nancy Pelsosi who stated that they had to pass it before they could find out what was in it.
Unfortunately, I also have to state that the republicans will not pass a law stating that Congress should also be covered by obama scam.
When it comes to food you have to understand the USDA guidelines for what constitutes food.
By law a food product must contain 70% of the food listed on the label in order to called 100% real food. By USDA guidelines if you have 10 pounds of hamburger and you remove 3 pounds of the hamburger and replace it with 3 pounds of sewage, you can still call it 100% pure beef.
I did not pull this figure out of thin air. Go read the USDA guidelines on their website. It may take a few minutes to find them.
Andrew Heller says
Gee, it’s almost as if I hadn’t started that blurb with the words “Polls are polls …” Maybe I need to amend to be excruciatingly clear: “Polls are polls, so take them with a huge dose of rock salt, but …”